God’s plan for our kids is for them to become progressively less and less dependant on us and eventually to leave our home. We can help them develop the skills they are going to need as adults by allowing them to make more age-appropriate choices and experience the consequences of those choices.
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
Learning to be a good decision-maker is a skill that is learned, and kids will make mistakes along the way. You will be tempted to intervene to prevent mistakes or rescue your kids from consequences, because you hate to see them in pain. Challenge yourself to adopt a longer perspective and ask yourself what will be more painful — allowing them to make mistakes under your roof or postponing the learning opportunity until later in life when the stakes are much higher?
Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
When you allow your kids to experience the consequences of their mistakes, you not only help them learn to make better choices now, you prepare them to be capable adults.
Exerts taken from the Parenting by Design Devotional on YouVersion.